The fine print

Ever wonder what quirky incentives some baseball players have in their contracts? Are you like me in that you enjoy reading that some players actually have it stipulated that they must travel to road games in an airplane fueled by bio-diesel?

Actually, I made that last one up. In fact, writer Rick Paulas made up a few like that on his own for the web site of indie publisher Timothy McSweeney’s, home to such literary all-stars like Dave Eggers, David Byrne, Neal Pollack, Nick Hornby and Jonathan Lethem.

Paulas even got his eyes on new Phillie Adam Eaton’s deal where it reads:

Upon signing, Eaton received a certified doctor's note from the best psychiatrist in Philadelphia addressed to the commissioner's office, informing them that he must wear an iPod while pitching to drown out the inevitable boos that come with playing in Philadelphia. This, the doctor argued, will keep Eaton's fragile psyche in check, allowing the city's residents to sleep in peace without worrying about another “ugly incident.”

Actually, that might not be made up.

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